The world has plenty of highly-intelligent and opportunistic dogs. The problem is that people, especially today, tend to treat their dogs like children. By anthropomorphizing, give dogs human emotions, we then find it difficult to treat dogs like dogs.
Dogs, however, suffer from no such confusion. They know they are dogs. They know exactly what they can get away with, how often and for how long.
After all, a dog’s every need is satisfied by humans. He eats, sleeps, plays and even goes to the bathroom when we say. So he watches us. He studies our moves, habits, mannerisms. That’s why he pushes our buttons so effectively.
But that is also precisely why it is so damn easy to train him.
The hurdle dog owners must first climb is letting go of the notion that a dog is anything more than a dog. The truth is, in one key way, dogs are very much like children: They act as though they want to be in control, but once they have it, they get confused and insecure. Sometimes, that manifests as aggression. Sometimes it’s just plain fear.
Dogs are happiest when they are being told what to do, when they are firmly and respectfully led by their humans. It gives them security. They are a species that needs to follow. I’ve seen proof in countless ways over the years. But one dog, Max, is probably the best textbook example.
I sold Max to a nice family as an 8-week-old puppy. As often happens, after the initial weeks of new dog ownership passed, I never heard from his family again. Until about 7 years later.
Max’s family had split up and the husband, who had custody of the dog, could no longer keep him. By now, Max was an extremely large, un-neutered male German Shepherd. He was an imposing presence and had a habit of using his strength and size to intimidate his owners – and everyone else. It’s how he got what he wanted.
When Max was returned to me – a requirement of my contract – the first thing I noticed was that his owner was afraid of him. The dog had never bitten anyone, but was a bully, the man said. This was apparent when I asked him to put Max in an empty kennel.
“But he doesn’t like those,” he said.
“So?” I said.
“Well, I don’t want to make him do it.”
After watching his owner unsuccessfully coax, plead, and cajole Max to a kennel for some time, I took the leash and brought the dog in myself. Max looked surprised. Why I didn’t ask him first?
In the weeks that followed, it was obvious this dog had been allowed to do whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted. He was bossy. He barked incessantly when he wanted to be fed, or to play, or anything else. I ignored him. No talking, petting or even eye contact.
When I went to his kennel to clean and give him food or water (three times a day), he jumped all over me, barking inches from my face, sometimes snarling. I pushed him off and ignored him more. When jumping failed, he would run straight at me and toss his weight into my legs. I stuck out my foot and let him meet my shoe.
Large dogs who have learned to use their brawn and size as leverage are dangerous. The only way to reform a dog like that is to starve him for attention. Eventually, the dog will be so happy to see a human, he acts like a submissive puppy – instead of a growling idiot.
And that’s exactly what happened with Max. It took about three weeks of withholding attention before Max stopped barking, snarling, jumping and body-slamming. When he was good, he got a quick pat on the head. A week after that, we progressed to real affection and a little play time. Every time he behaved, and did as I asked, he got lavish praise. When he tried to put a toe out of line, he went back in his kennel – alone.
Even at 7 years old, Max blossomed into a well-adjusted, happy, playful dog. We had him neutered and found him a new home, with owners who knew his history and had experience with large German Shepherds. He lives with his “new” family still.
If you want a dog who is a joy to live with, who you can take places, who will do as you ask, then treat him like a dog. People do not take orders from dogs. We do not play with, feed, walk, or pat a dog when he decides that is what he wants. We do not allow ill-mannered dogs to walk all over us. It’s a recipe for disaster.
Had Max been allowed to stay with his family, he very well could have seriously hurt someone – including one of the young children he lived with.
Lead your dog. Show him what is acceptable behavior. If you can’t, find a trainer who can. Anything else is simply irresponsible.
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